Winter Task Feedback

For our seminar on Friday 11th January, we were split into two groups where we then gave each other feedback on our winter tasks. Below are the notes that I took during this two hour session:

Edward Burtinsky

Yasmin

  • Split up into three different narratives
  • Like a poem – three images
  • Rhythm
  • Shoe photo – full stop
  • Photo books – Robert Frank’s the Americans – 4 paragraphs, pattern, flow, structure

Me

  • Well planned
  • Clear narrative
  • Theories
  • Intimate
  • Personal
  • Hard and busy to soft and calm
  • POV images

Bryony

  • Split into half and half
  • Rituals and meetings
  • Monotony
  • Too much going on
  • Interesting narrative but different to your introduction
  • Chronological
  • Nice sequence walk
  • John Gossage book – “The Pond”
  • Can’t really get into the flow – maybe if it were all in pairs
  • Needs to bring us back into the house before we have an ending

Lucy

  • Alec Soth’s – “From here to there”
  • Mission
  • Find the cutest animal – rather than the loneliest man like in Alec Soth’s
  • Why black and white – hard decision, represents the past, erases continuity, lighting changes, in a short narrative like this it makes it a definite collection
  • Hard to condense it to 10
  • Sub-narrative – different directions within the day
  • Could tell this story in 5 images

Jade

  • Similar to summer task
  • Wanted to create something different
  • House a home and how different it is to Uni
  • Everyday starts with time
  • Memories
  • Changing orientation – horizontal to vertical – distorts narrative
  • Words between images – distorts narrative
  • Personal narrative – order and progression
  • Why colour? – Different stages
  • Why chores? – Summer task focused on herself
  • Generic – still lives, everyone can relate to it
  • Don’t really have the idea of time
  • Colour helps the images flow

Josh

  • How could I think outside the box
  • Focus on what you would tell people
  • Nicholas Nixon
  • Shown as a video
  • Music really adds to the narrative and emotional value
  • Very emotional and personal
  • Decided to put it in video
  • Recorded the music himself – granddads favourite piece
  • Hiding emotion behind the camera
  • Music speaks universally – needed to know what the information was about the music
  • All natural – opportunistic – took photos as if he was an outsider, such as a nurse
  • Very much a document
  • Film by Julie Winocar and Ed Cashy – “Friends for Life”
  • Pursue hospitals further

Jenny

  • Showed the day through shoes
  • Did you look at Tom Robinsons “Feet First”?
  • Colour – lighting and colour change throughout the day
  • Similar atmospheres
  • Similar composition – flip of each other
  • Washing and water constantly appear
  • Don’t have to flow perfectly but can have themes and motifs to help get back to narrative
  • Steve Pikes – “Shoes”
  • There are a lot of other visual messages
  • How would it look if it was just from the soles of the feet?

 Emma

  • “Boring crap”
  • Creating the magic for everyone else
  • Based on tradition
  • Names – add something to the photographs
  • Images get more blurry as the day went on, deliberate – observer rather than participating, its how she feels, mum perspective
  • Remind us of instagram
  • Little descriptions remind us of the social network
  • Instantly understand that aesthetic
  • Snap-shots

Olly

  • Square images
  • Very hard to critique when its not in the right image
  • Why are they all different formats – thought of them as images rather than a series
  • Originally in a PowerPoint
  • Middle image of being with your friend rather than following your friend
  • Relatable
  • Doesn’t interest us as there are too many images on the walk that he have
  • Hard to engage when there is no emotion
  • Include little events to make it more personal

Katherine

  • Not in the right order
  • How the day goes by really quickly – gets dark early
  • Two main colours – blue and yellow, green McDonalds one is out of place
  • Colour – miserable if it was in black and white, can pick up the detail
  • Bird and McDonalds out of place
  • Food taken with the flash
  • Different lighting situations – stops the flow of the narrative, can show the progression of the day

Anastasia

  • Trip up to Jordan
  • All same colour apart from one
  • Not intimate more like a documentary
  • Before Petra – more of a sense of her eye
  • In Petra – more tourist like and generic
  • Last photos are more like snap-shots rather than narrative

Charli

  • Last one was in colour because it had more dimension – black and white shows more mundane day and colour shows excitement
  • Time at beginning and end – framing
  • Taryn Simon – “An American Index of the hidden and unfamiliar”
  • “Tables of Power” – Jacquline Hassink
  • Last photo – what is going to happen afterwards?
  • Polaroid layout – more personal
  • Diptych of triptych to start of so that we get the idea

Trang

  • Close-up of objects
  • Didn’t know how to represent the end of the day
  • Top two shows the impact on what she has had on them whereas the other photographs are more of what she is doing
  • Personal to documentation
  • Soft to harsh
  • Takes away from the subtlety of the first two image

Natalia

  • Recording the whole day
  • Really intimate – an assumption is made here, already got up
  • Dived straight into the narrative
  • That one image already shows the main jist of the story
  • A couple of themes/motifs – window, feet and legs show that she is continuing the journey
  • Motif helps us stay on that narrative
  • More natural – sometimes looking down, looking up, key buildings that we notice
  • No literal photos of the journey – more relatable and interesting
  • Didn’t use flash as it would wash out the subject
  • Slightly reduced colours – flattened, slightly muted

Siyana

  • Colour popping
  • Why did you put the top two photographs next to each other?
  • Umbrella seen as a motif – visually striking, make it a feature of the narrative
  • Very strong images
  • Only one image where his face is being shown
  • Commercial – advertising of a product rather than documentation of a day
  • Do not need umbrella to be red as we will figure it out in out own time
  • Colour red can be used to represent passion and gives the audience clues that this person is a boyfriend rather than just a person

Kellie

  • Busy day
  • Photos are too dark in the middle – just how they came out, wanted it to be more snapshot like
  • Blurred – shows how busy the day was
  • Two images at the end are too similar
  • Less intimate
  • Didn’t get the beginning of the day

After we went through everyones winter task and gave them helpful critical analysis, we were then given a task to complete over the weekend for out seminars on Tuesday 15th January. We are to photograph another narrative, but instead of editing it ourselves, we are to give it to our partner so that they choose the final images and sequencing. I was paired with Trang and the results of this task are shown below:

My narrative, my sequencing:

Sign Photo 1 - Holly Constantine

Waiting Photo 2 - Holly Constantine

Train Photo 3 - Holly Constantine

Searching Photo 4 - Holly Constantine

Costa Photo 5 - Holly Constantine

Smile Photo 6 - Holly Constantine

Camden Photo 7 - Holly Constantine

Lights Photo 8 - Holly Constantine

Train Times Photo 9 - Holly Constantine

Homeward Bound - Holly Constantine

My narrative, Trang’s sequencing:

Photo 1 - Holly Constantine

Photo 2 - Holly Constantine

Photo 3 - Holly Constantine

Photo 4 - Holly Constantine

Photo 5 - Holly Constantine

Photo 6 - Holly Constantine

Photo 7 - Holly Constantine

Photo 8 - Holly Constantine

Photo 9 - Holly Constantine

Photo 10 - Holly Constantine

Trang’s Feedback and why she choose these photographs and sequence:

1) I think this image shows more of what you are doing and is a good one to start off with. I can see that your boyfriend is waiting for some sort of travel (in this case the train). I like how you have him in focus against the train tracks and boards blurred in the background. I think this image is more powerful than your original first image simply because I can clearly see him waiting for a train. I don’t think the departure board is truly necessary; this is why I chose this image to start off with!

2) I kept this photograph because it shows that you are now on the train. You have the train windows and what’s outside captured in motion, which is obvious that you are travelling somewhere. Simple photograph and easy to read.

3) Again, I kept this photograph in the sequence because it shows that your boyfriend is off the train and is now walking somewhere. Good that you have included his backpack in the frame, it shows you are both on some sort of journey. This photo represents that you are both walking somewhere, this time travelling by foot.

4) Compared to the previous photo, here I can see that you have possibly arrived at one of your destinations? In the previous one in the background, were just houses which indicate you haven’t arrived anywhere yet unlike this photo. This photograph ends the first  sequence of 3, which shows your travel. Here, your documentation on arrival begins.

5) Now in the moment. Although it seems a little staged (if it’s not meant to be!) I chose this photo because it shows that you are both having a good time and he is smiling for the camera; almost like a snapshot. You are obviously in the middle of an outside shopping centre, which indicates your activity at that moment in time. Again, this photo is easy to read since you have a number of different subjects in the background.

6) Very similar to the 5th photograph, however shows you are at a different location, but your boyfriend is still smiling for the camera. Almost seems like a holiday shot where he is framed on the sides (on the right in picture 5 and on the left in picture 6), with buildings and people in the background. Seems much busier than before, but I can gather the fact that you are both still exploring and visiting places.

7) I kept this photograph in your sequence because this ends the previous two images (5 and 6) since you are now indoors having a coffee! Almost like a little break from walking and exploring London. I think it’s quite appropriate to start off with this one.

8) This photograph looks really natural where you’ve captured him off guard talking. Again, this shows that you are in the moment and in the middle of a conversation.

9) I think it’s important to include the fact that you have left London and you are now travelling back. Compared to your original photograph (photo 10) I don’t think it’s quite clear that your day has ended just yet. This photo of an empty train carriage indicates that it’s quite late and you are on your way back to Coventry. I think this photo helps narrate your images a bit more.

10) The final image is very simple. Almost like a full stop to your story. There are no people or buildings involved in this photograph – just a board stating “Coventry” which is home. It’s very different to the rest of your images. It’s easy to tell that you are now back at home.
In General:

I think your images are very interesting and I like the fact you have documented the whole day! Although a lot has gone on, I think it’s important to include moments of your day but carefully picking out the most appropriate images to present that. Compared to your first set of photographs of your Christmas task, I think these set of images are much easier to read since there is a clearer story line. Maybe include a few images of yourself participating in a few activities.

Trang’s narrative, Trang’s sequencing:

Photo 1 - Trang Huynh

Photo 2 - Trang Huynh

Photo 3 - Trang Huynh

Photo 4 - Trang Huynh

Photo 5 - Trang Huynh

Photo 6 - Trang Huynh

Photo 7 - Trang Huynh

Photo 8 - Trang Huynh

Photo 9 - Trang Huynh

Photo 10 - Trang Huynh

Trang’s narrative, my sequencing:

Photo 1 - Trang Huynh

Photo 2 - Trang Huynh

Photo 3 - Trang Huynh

Photo 4 - Trang Huynh

Photo 5 - Trang Huynh

Photo 6 - Trang Huynh

Photo 7 - Trang Huynh

Photo 8 - Trang Huynh

Photo 9 - Trang Huynh

Photo 10 - Trang Huynh

My Feedback to Trang and why I choose these photographs and sequence:

1) I decided to choose this as the initial image as there is a sense of abstractness which draws the viewer into this particular narrative. It is also a definite starting point as, although it can be seen as an abstract photograph, the viewer is able to understand what the subject is and can use this image to represent the start of the day.

2) I thought that your choice of the first two images were very well thought out. This second image shows what seems to be a main event of your day (getting ready for work) and allows the viewer to assume that you have carried out other, more stereotypical daily regimes without having to show it (i.e having breakfast).
3) I chose this image as your third photo of the series as I believe that it continued to show your preparation for work and how you had an effect on the environment around you: you left a trace. I also think that the point of view shot that was used in this particular image is very interesting when twinned with the complex design of the basket, making the viewer think twice as to what they are looking at.
4) I think that this photograph can be used very well to end the beginning of your narrative. It shows the closure of the first part of the linear storyline, and is a good pause and connection to the middle section of this story. This photograph can almost be seen as a ‘full-stop’ to the first part of your narrative, and offers the viewer a chance to prepare themselves for the change in event.
5) As said above, this image shows a change in event throughout your narrative. You are no longer inside and getting ready for work, but you are now making your way to work.
Although there are no photographs of your actual work place, photograph two gave the viewer a clue that you were going to work that day. This is why, when they only see that one outdoor image to represent the whole middle of the day, they assume that you were either too busy to take photos, or weren’t actually allowed due to company policy.
6) This photograph shows a contrast to the previous image which allows the viewer to understand that they have now moved on to the end section of your narrative but that they are still following the same storyline. By seeing this photo, some of the viewers will begin to understand that you are now back from work and are settling down for a relaxing evening ahead.
7) When the viewer sees this particular image, the majority of them will have to look twice to double check that their suspicions of what they are viewing are correct. Once they have noticed that it is a photograph of laundry, they then begin to relate to this image and how most of them tend to change out of their work clothes as soon as they get back home in order for their relaxing evening to commence.
8) This intimate photograph of a cup of tea, on first glance seems nice and relaxing, merely because of the subject. However, the darkness to the image adds a form off edge and eeriness which can be used as a tool by the viewer to give them a clue that something not so relaxing is about to happen.
9) This image proves to the viewer that their suspicions were correct in the previous photograph. The way that this image has been framed, capturing as much writing in the image as possible, twinned with the disregarded pen and the contrast in colour, can all be used by the viewer to represent how hard the work was to the photographer.
10) This final image successfully completes the narrative in a range of different ways. The angle in which the image was taken suggests that the photographer was laying down on some form of sofa as a way of relaxing after completing the busy day that she had. The fact that this image is also a lot darker than the previous image and the fact that the depth of field is a lot smaller, not only suggests that the daylight has got dimmer, but can be used to represent the closing eyes of the photographer after a long day.
In General:
  • This narrative is split into three parts, beginning (photo 1-4), middle (photo 5), and end (photo 6-10) which is the same structure as a linear short story.
  • I know that you were trying to show the trace that you had on the environment around you, but I can only really see this in photos 1, 3, 5, 7, and 8; the other photographs show what you did rather than your effect on them.
  • I can also tell that you attempted to show an intimate level within your photographs which were achieved successfully in a majority of them, but in the others, I think you simply needed to be closer to the subject.
  • Finally, I feel that your narrative and sequencing showed your day in a truer chronological order, but I couldn’t help but find that it was a bit all over the place and that it didn’t follow a linear narrative which made it hard for the viewer to understand that this was indeed a narrative. I feel that the way I sequenced the narrative makes it easier for the viewer to understand and relate to this storyline as it shows a stereotypical daily regime that the majority of people can understand.

If you wish to see more of Trang’s work, please feel free to visit: http://trangtranphotography.wordpress.com

 

On Friday 18th January 2013, we then recieved our feedback from this group project which I have shown below:

Yasmin on Anastasia’s work:

  • Only had 13 images to work with
  • Sense of light
  • Some photos in colour, others in black and white
  • Bit jarred

Anastasia on Yasmin’s work:

  • Nice images
  • Well sequenced
  • Natural link to last image – acts as a full stop

Trang on Holly’s work:

  • Big jump at end
  • Some posed images
  • Documentary to awareness of the camera then back to more natural
  • Nice shapes on second and third image, flows into the next images
  • This is a moving image
  • Stop at half point

Holly on Trang’s work:

  • Very first image – soft and relaxed, shows she has just got out of bed
  • First images are busy – hectic period of time
  • 5 – break, viewer has time to reflect, collect your thoughts
  • Rinko Kawauchi
  • Attention to detail
  • Structure and patterns continue throughout the narrative
  • Pair images up by what they look like as well as looking at the whole narrative

Lucy on Katy’s work:

  • Diagonal lines gives energy
  • Lighting and colour the same in the beginning of the narrative
  • John Gossage – The Pond
  • Intimate
  • Really nice work – very strong narrative
  • Fallen into a trap where people think a narrative has to start with getting up and ending when we go to bed
  • Middle narrative is the strongest part

Katy on Lucy’s work:

  • Narrative based on lighting
  • Different lighting as we move through the narrative
  • Shapes and textures
  • Some images throw us a little bit
  • Move towards more artificial light

Jenny on Bryony’s work:

  • Two tiny narratives surrounding the main narrative of cooking
  • Need something to drive forward the narrative
  • “Like an image but there is two of them” – tiny moments
  • “Feels like a bolt on at the end”
  • Try and get used to another narrative but it doesn’t happen
  • Can pair two images of the tree and the egg together through the colours used

Bryony on Jenny’s work:

  • Individual narratives of the shoes
  • Can be a narrative as it tells the viewer what happens through the day from the point of view from the shoes

Olly on Kelly’s work:

  • Strong images
  • Pattern and routine shown through the narrative
  • Abstract images – question what the image is

Thomas on Gemma’s work:

  • Not really a narrative yet
  • But very good images
  • Have to set the scene before we look at the details
  • Like the use of water and reflection – perhaps create a narrative working around these

Natalia on Jade’s work:

  • 15 images given
  • Hard not to break the pattern of the narrative due to the little amount of images
  • Colour is working very well – muted, desaturated
  • Least that has technically happened – perhaps only 15 minutes of the day
  • Get a bit samey?
  • Like that it is ‘boring’ – it is true
  • Don’t have to show everything literally – we know that they would have got home
  • Some posed images
  • Don’t need to see quite so much

Jade on Natalia’s work:

  • Point of view
  • Motif’s – hands, black and white, little shafts of intense light
  • Straight lines that are constantly through the images
  • Light was the main focus of these images – she tried to control the light throughout her images

Katherine on Rachel’s work:

  • Tried to do it in terms of light
  • If they were the only images you have, it would be hard to create a narrative and would definitely have to rely on the visual
  • Kept the colour – nice orange colour, things got lost as they are very busy
  • Hard to see the flow but can get something from this
  • Stills things to read into this

Siyana on Charli’s work:

  • Got given 12 images
  • Kind of like a dream – not literal, don’t see much, little fragments of light
  • Strain to try and se things – like you are trying to remember something
  • Motif’s – snow and forced artificial light

Narrative, sequencing and pairing is so much stronger than what we showed last week

Think about:

  • Patterns
  • Flow
  • Colours
  • Timing
  • Breaking the sequence
  • Not being so literal
  • Experiment
  • It takes a lot just to make a sequence of 10 images
  • Little details as well as the moments
  • You don’t have to show everything to the viewer – they will make it up and understand
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